Say you left the house and before you did your spouse said "Hey honey, I'm going to clean the house while your gone." Surprised you exit feeling grateful for having such an amazing husband who thinks of things like this. But lets say when you arrive home, you find the place still a mess, laundry piled higher than Mt Everest, and toys and shoes cluttering the floor. Upon further inspection you notice that the floor was somewhat vacuumed and the kitchen was clean. Well, at least he tried right? Pause, before you feel the need to criticize. Instead of dwelling on all the other things that didn't get done, praise him for the effort he made. Truth be told, men are built differently. They don't always see the same details that we see. So instead of criticizing my husband for what he overlooked, I try to remember to praise him for what he did do right.
It takes a conscious effort to be positive, at least for me. I have to remind myself to see the good things in life, rather than dwell on the bad. When I dwell on all the negative things, I become riled up and go round and around until I'm more upset than when I started. Then when the anger passes I spiral into a depression that if left unchecked, is really hard to climb out of. There's a reason an estimate 350 million people in the world today deal with depression, and that women are affected more by it than men.
I find that surrounding myself with positive people and positive thinking, really makes a difference. Have you ever tried Dr Emoto's rice experiment? Take a batch of rice and separate it in two different jars. Each day you speak loving kind words to one and mean angry words to the other. By the time 30 days is up the love rice looks beautiful and fluffy, but the angry rice transformed into a blackish mold soup. The conclusion of this experiment was that the loving words created positive feeling, while the angry ones damaged the rice with bad sound waves. That being said, if negative words can change the appearance of rice, think of what it can do to a persons soul? Better yet, think how it can affect our children. I always try to let my kids know how much I love them, especially after I just got done yelling at them, because I want them to know that even though I'm angry, it doesn't change my love for them.
Sometimes we are bombarded by negativity, whether it come from an internal source or an external one. There are ways to stay positive in almost any situation, and sometimes it does take effort. I have to choose to see the glass half full. I have to chose to be happy. When I get bombarded by negative thoughts or totally stressed out of my mind, I have to listen to something positive or uplifting. Lately its been the Andy Grammar song 'Keep Your Head Up' while I go for a walk. Exercise does wonders! According to WebMD: Exercise creates endorphins which react with your brain to reduce your perception of pain and creates positive feeling in your body, similar to that of morphine.
Positive people live longer and are healthier! The Mayo Clinic did a 30 year study of 447 people that optimist had 50 percent lower risk of earlier death than pessimists. They conclude "Mind and body are linked and attitude has an impact on the final outcome - death."
So there you have it. If you stay positive you can live longer, avoid being a moldy soupy mess, and have a happier marriage and family. And most importantly you'll feel good. It just seems with so much negativity swirling around these days, and with the mass population battling depression that something needs to change. I can't change the world, all I can do is start with myself and hope it catches on.